Guess What!?

I AM BACK!!

Sorry for the absence for so long. It really has been quite a while. Been busy with so many things and have not really had time to sit down and blog.

What am I busy with? Work of course... and there's also Love.

Work - Always busy traveling and pushing for sales. This year's target is really high. I wonder if a miracle is gonna happen and who knows? We might just hit it, but as of now... it looks bleak

Love - Gonna be married soon! I feel both excited and irritated. Excited is self-explanatory. Irritated coz got so many things to coordinate! And I am not really getting alot of support from the other half. I am bitching now... but really deep deep down she is a really wonderful person to be with. SO pls do not think I am complaining tt she is no good.

Any thoughts about the past year?

Well, for a start there's the global inflation we are fighting this year. Blardy hell... everything also raise price. And our salaries are not rising enough to combat this. Did you know that Dubai raised the salary of their govt. officers by 70%? Sighz... We need more money.

Another issue. The HDB is not building enough flats to house young people who wants to start their own families. Can you imagine 10,000 applicants for just 1000plus units? Ridiculous! And BTOs are stoopid coz they take 4yrs to build. Does the HDB know how to build flats? Surely they know there are more ppl who need places to stay? Surely they saw the increase in demand with the relaxation of foreign talents coming into Singapore and no. of en-blocs? Why can't they start building them now?? And there they are trying to get us to start families earlier...

Or is there a larger conspiracy to bring up the real estate prices??

Anyways, a typical Singaporean guy starts working at around the age of 26. He needs to work for at least 3yrs before he can afford a wedding etc. And the day he decides to get hitched, he realised he and his wife cannot get a place to stay. And they spent all their savings and money on getting the weddings etc.. ready. Hence they will not be able to afford a resale flat. So we give and take, the guy is married at age 30. He still needs to wait another 4yrs for the flat to be ready. He will be 34 by the time he gets his own place. His wife is likely to be 1-4 yrs younger. Youngest she can be will be 30yrs old. In between the 4yrs, unlikely they will bear any babies, coz they will be staying with their in-laws. Not much privacy... (u get what i mean?)

Scientific research says a women has reduced chances of being able to conceive after she reaches 30. No wonder our birth level is below the replacement level.

And to add to that, age 30 and above is when your career is pushing towards the highest level. What will you choose? Career or starting your own family?

You choose career, you are unable to start a family due to the work committments. You choose family, you risk lesser pay in future and are unable to support family with your pay.

So how to choose? Can the govt advise?

Callen's right. I miss the good old days.

Life after working for one and a half year feels very messed up. Gone are the days when you get time off from school to think and reflect. Gone are the days when a group of friends get to enjoy each other's company by sitting down and lazing the afternoon away. I really miss those days.

NOSTALGIA.

I remember reading about "nostalgia" back in the university when i took up the "film and history" module from History department. It stated that nostalgia used to a disease. It was a disease soldiers had. After being out at war for the longest time, soldiers begin to miss home. They begin to miss their family and friends; days when they were carefree as children. They start to vomit, do alot of funny funny things and become crazy after some time. Doctors tried to cure them with many many funny things too - they feel them earthworms, earth etc... With the hope that these soldiers will return to normal and continue to fight the wars.

I didn't blog as often after i started working. One reason was i spend  too much time at work and there really is nothing fun to blog about work. Sometimes i even consider my work to be confidential - so can't discuss much. Next thing was i also spend alot of time dating. So when you combine the two together - No time.

This also meant i did not reflect and think about myself for the longest time. I feel tired.

I like my job. You get to travel, fly around places and such. But it is really stressful and i am starting to feel its toil. Especially recently when i often feel "victimised" by a bitch a work. I feel this bitch screams at me and scold for the sake of doing so. Very irritating. And being the nice guy that I am, i prefer to keep quiet and tried bottle things up. I finally decided to talk to a senior at work, but didn't manage to relieve much of the pressure.

Can you imagine when you are trying to get work done and this person whom you have no choice but to work with shouts at and ignores you? Very dulan and cannot do a thing. Almost every single thing you try to do that is related to her, you will be shouted and hurled abuses at. Everyone in the office accepts it as it is because its her style and she does her job well. Sighz... being the most junior become almost like a burden.

And at home, there are many issues to be resolved. I am experiencing an entire paradigm shift with reference to family life. To me, it used to be that when you start working, its normal to start paying for the family bills and giving family allowances to my dad, mum and grandma. For the past year, it was ok and i had no problems doing so.

However, recently, with plans to start my own family soon. I realised that what appears to be "normal" to me isn't really that normal after all. I found out that other people's families do not have the same family culture as mine. The parents of these people actually continue to take care of themselves and encourage the children to save up their money to start a family. So ends up these people can start a family alot earlier than me. I do not mean to be unfillial or anything like that. But it just feels that my family is not at all supportive of their children starting their own families.

Even if we want to start a family, we still have to continue paying for our parents when all are still capable of taking care of themselves. This became my dillemma - i want to continue paying for everything my family needs and yet i also wish to start my own family. Which comes first?

Very very tiring and many many problems coming up everyday. No solutions. Advice anyone?